Why live in this world with these Faldonites?

I have seen many pleas for help go unanswered ont his board. There are many people who seem to have lived abused childhoods and are emotionally unstable. Yet you Faldon people do nothing but make fun of them. You think it is funny. Hower, it is not. You all suck.

I would like to tell everyone who goes to this board that was made fun of because you tried to kill yourself, or you think you can fly, or your 43 and live in your parents basement.. There is a way out.

Join my Secret Club. I have purchased land, buildings and fences for your safety. We have also set up heavily armed guards to protect out compound from the outside world and to protect the subjects of our great god Mezporian.

If you decide to join us leave everything behind, Mezporian provides all that is needed here. We await for her arrival to pick up the new comers as some of us stay behind and usher in more. SHe will take you to the promised lands.. an entirely new world.

Mondays - feature Square Dancing to the only earth group that speaks Mezporians true language.. The Blue Man Group.
Tuesdays - Are the always fun Bingo and Battleship night
Wednesday - On this day we find a nearby Catholic and beat him with a stick... then convert him
Thursday - This is the greatest day.. We stay up for 24 hours and do nothing but Pray to our great Mezporian!
Friday - The weekly Circle Jerk and Fisting Night
Saturday - The men sing as the good looking new recruite females pleasure the priests.
Sundays - We all cower in fear as everyone else in this Mezporian forsaken world prays to a pagan god and hope that Mezporian doesnt destroy the human race on that instant.

And then... in three months we will have the great Koolaide party! Everyone but the priests Share in a drink of Koolaide as the mothership passes above us and you are taken to the promised land... White Robes and Nikes are a must for this night!!!

I'll be seeing ya!